so why should I

there’s a big spider on the other side of my window. it might be a sign from the universe that if i look at myself in the mirror i can see something else. i can see someone else; a change that hasn’t been there; maybe it wasn’t supposed to be there or maybe it was; it’s windy and the spider is hanging onto its web, just stays there; it doesn’t move right or left, i don’t know what it’s going to do next; i can’t move.

so i’m just going to be a cat. cats don’t give a fuck. so why should ? the body knows what to do, so why should ?

ça colle

i remember that morning like it was yesterday you slept for two hours maybe then i came into your room I was looking for that hug again longing for it craving for it knowing its all wrong but knowing its the only thing i need 

maybe you touched my left arm then you left for work and i knew i had to leave too

i remember that morning like it was yesterday 

the park was all green and fresh mixing up our alcohol breaths in the air going back to our homes with a strange question mark above our heads 

will i ever see that room again

   two weeks later i was back i remember that day

“you need to find a career didi that’s what you need” I can’t I belong to so many places so many things and so many times in history 

I belong to Bach’s rhythms forms and textures 

I belong to the hippie jeans of the 70s I belong to Warsaw after the war

I grieve 

for being small particles of dust spread all over the universe and the only thing that makes me feel like que ça colle it’s writing